“Always be a first rate version of yourself instead of a second rate version of somebody else.”
- Judy Garland
It may be part of the aging process but I'm really adopting the attitude that I am who I am. What you see is what you get. No apologies. If you don't like me, that's okay. Not everyone is going to like me. It's okay. I'll do what I can with my health and with my money, but what I know I definitely have control of is this - the ability to live emotionally free, free of hostility, free of guilt, of resentment, of pretending.
I am in training, reminding myself that in every interaction, every moment, sacredness is on the line. And I get to choose how to respond - I can call on those old friends (ass and queen) or I can choose not to fall for it, I can choose a loving, creative response, because I'm taking care of myself. I do not want to become what I so desperately deplore. I want kindness - of course towards others - but also for me.
My favorite Joni Mitchell song, Woman of Heart and Mind, here for your pleasure:
And the best lines of the song:
You know the times you impress me most
Are the times when you don't try
When you don't even try