Friday, February 20, 2015

You already have my enduring love.

Predicted to launch in early April...the Apple Watch is highly anticipated by tech savvy consumers and gadget lovers, for sure!  And my love gave me a $400 Apple Store gift card to order one.

But I'm waiting for a much bigger development...a phenomenon also expected in early 2015, and one that promises to surpass all that technology nonsense.  

I will soon have the gift of a grandchild. 

I will soon become a grandmother.  I will move...up (out? over?  down?) a generation.  

Thirty years ago, I did not think much about what motherhood would do to my life, and it changed everything.  I was ill-prepared, overwhelmed, and instantly in love with all of it.

And now, well, I'm at the threshold of my daughter's door, ready to help, poised for grand mothering, and I'm wondering...will I know what to do?  Will I take to it so quickly?  So completely? 

I learned many, many things in my early years of mothering, mostly joy, and how to really, constantly, put others first. God's presence was an overnight epiphany.  As the children came, my confidence did, and I grew to believe my own voice, and trust my heart and soul.  I was needed, I was important, and I took to these heady feelings like new friends.

So 2015.  I'm waiting for April - not a gadget, phase or fad.  This is a being, a loved one, a family member we've yet to meet. Someone whose very presence will change the way I see the world, again. 

I'm dreaming about Baby Special.  Headbands, bow ties...grandson or granddaughter - I am awaiting my turn to give love to this child I will soon know, soon enjoy, soon indulge, soon help lead through this beautiful, crazy world. 

I may order the Apple Watch (do grandmothers wear things that cool?), but its glitter will fade, an update may break it, and I will eventually misplace it.  

My grandchild is launching in April, too, and I'm already standing in line, ready to love, waiting for the really big arrival, the huge surprise, the everlasting bond, the Special news.    
My firstborn, baby Special's mama, Kate.
My dear Katharine Jeanne
This pretty much sums up August 1984.

1 comment:

  1. This made me cry. Baby Special is lucky to have you as his/her grandmother!!!